The complication of those earrings the texture of the paint around your eyes the sun’s highlights in your hair
The redness of those parting lips such belief in everything we said the pristine shape of your nose
Lying on the roof your head close to my heart summer blushing the sky weren’t we beautiful weren’t we beautiful then
Nothing to fret about just prolong the passing day swaying through the city weren’t we beautiful there
The precision of our jaw-lines the optimism in our hearts skidding through that midnight snowfall spelling out each other’s names as I caught you in my arms
We were so alive so in love so beautiful at that moment in our lives…
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Senses softened in the dark afternoon This year is charring in the fire grate So, I pour out into the haunted fields looking for loneliness, for lines, for clues to get a handle on all that’s happened to make predictions on where I am headed
All around my body, the world’s covered by a sheet life’s decorator is preparing to paint the new year This land spills on for snowy miles my past reels out somewhere behind me in those paths taken, in those choices made; there are glimpses of the shape of my future
The Grecian islands, the Cornish coast Those petty milestones, those brave goodbyes from swollen ankles, to exploded minds Portuguese walled-towns, to Derbyshire hills From a decade planted, then uprooted and moved the letting go, the keeping a hold Surprises; surprising, plans made and fulfilled much falls away, much more presents itself weddings, worries, work; with friends consciousness glides across the ghostly fields comes to rest behind my smiling eyes
So, now I have the things I’ve always wanted the peace I chased, the love I imagined the tools I’ll need are all within me and Kate is waiting, with her key, somewhere
By the gate, I pause, look up into the nothing time stands still, my eyes adjust… the pitch black night is full of stars (when did I last see those?) My gaze breaks, my footsteps in the powder flow time moves, I need for nothing else… I go back into the house
Toss my wondering on the fire pour a drink, talk to my family I’m satisfied and warm…
I will never learn from my affairs they bake within my heart but nowhere else see, she looks at me she may speak to me some short time then suddenly and so completely it’s all I feel a love that is not real all I can do is hang from her every movement…
Yet again, I’m helplessly hopeful for that breath already feeding myself on the bliss of kisses promised but those suggestions don’t emanate from her or anywhere but in my spiralled mind as it fills with love for some ideal all I can do is hang from her slightest smile…
The purity of beauty is a trap for me my mind is weak and falls so quickly before I can blink, it’s all that I can see I twist until the heartbreak of this infinity…
If only obsession didn’t roost inside these bones if only my mind knew some subtle patience I’ll lay myself down in that spinning room try to think of something else or someone other but no thought can form while she has not spurned all I can do is hang myself on her polite decline…
The purity of beauty is a trap for me I build myself a cave so homely lie scheming on the hope that she embodies and twist until my heart breaks in this infinity…
The Lighthouse 