All the faith carried in your soul
and all the morphine
lightening the load
they play a strange sad game
spinning lies in devilish ways
I listened to your doctor speaking
as you read from some ancient tome
yes, you know your body well
but pain isn’t the cause
This belief takes its small toll
the colour and the hope draining away
defeatedly, you feel
you’re failing
But you’re not fading
you’re not going anywhere
I take your hand to emphasize
you’re not slipping from this life
you’re falling into morphine
warm and wide
with those tired eyes
You say to me
‘Son, He is waiting
will you pray for me?
I feel Him come for me’
but even faithlessly
I know he’d not be ready
it’s just the morphine murmuring
as you try to start our last goodbye
I smile, say ‘it’s alright
And you’re not fading
you’re not going anywhere’
I look deep into your eyes
say ‘you’re not slipping from this life
you’re falling into morphine
warm and wide
just sleep tonight’
In this windowless room
you’ll see no blinding light
come for you in the night
You look at me and say you’re ‘sure’
think I’m angry
because I ‘can’t bare to hear’
I’m just frustrated
by those velvet hands
rummaging in your brain
and your absent God
And all that morphine
wet and warm
you’re wading through tonight
I love you, mum
and you’re not going anywhere…
[2015]
Thanks for reading.
The Lighthouse 